Only With Your Heart - Only With Your Heart SS29

This Love Hurts (2)

The second night dawned, and on the evening of the third day, Lukrov and Rodolgo made it to the remote village.

It had been several years since he had been there, but the place was even more rundown than he remembered, with only a single route left in ruins.

‘Chizuru was in a place like this? For more than six days already?’

Just the thought of it was enough to stir up Lukrov’s protectiveness.

‘Ridiculous ……. This is not Chizuru; you know that. There’s nothing to be protective about….’

No matter how much he told himself that, the anxiety and anticipation kept building up again and again. From now on, Lukrov had to face someone who might look like Chizuru.

The disappointment he felt at that moment was so heart-wrenching that he didn’t even want to be reminded of it anymore.

And yet, Lukrov had come here.

Driven by a faint hope.

A dream with no end.

“Wife! I’ve come back now!”

Rodolgo shouted in front of a house made of stone situated in the center of the village.

The house looked like it was about to fall, but it was also the best-looking house in the village.

He could see two women standing in front of the entrance from a distance.

An older woman and a younger girl.

In other words, neither of them could be Chizuru. Lukrov maintained his distance and kept his helmet on. He didn’t want anyone to see the look of disappointment on his face. He didn’t want anyone to witness that he was crumbling away in a way that was more unsightly than this crumbling building.

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes within his helmet.

‘I only need a moment… one moment, that’s all. Let me dream.’

Behind his closed eyelids, Lukrov pictured Chizuru from fourteen years ago. Her anxious eyes when he first met her, her innocent smile that eventually turned into a bright smile, her cute habit of pouting her lips when she was angry…

‘It’s okay if it’s just for a moment – just for a moment. I’m only living in this illusion now.’

Rodolgo continued to shout, but it did not reach Lukrov’s ears.

  ──Chizuru.

 Just one more second.

  ──Chizuru.

 One more time.

Lukrov opened his eyes.

Lukrov stiffened as the dark-haired girl came into view. The way she looked at him, it was as if she was anxiously waiting for something to happen.

“Well, mister, what do you think? She’s just like I said, isn’t she? She just needs a little polish and some good clothes, and she’ll look great!”

Rodolgo’s raspy voice broke the silence, but Lukrov did not move an inch – no, he couldn’t.

‘It’s impossible. It’s impossible. It’s impossible.’

‘Damn it, I’ve finally lost my mind; I’ve always had the illusion of Chizuru standing before me, so many times to the point that I lost count, but this is the first time I have seen one so clear and vivid.’

Chizuru’s illusion did something that Lukrov remembered well, a habit of hers. She clasped her hands in front of her chest. And…….

“Lukrov…..?”

The illusion called out Lukrov’s name in the same voice as in the vague memory he had almost forgotten.

“You’re Lukrov, right? Do you remember me? I’m Chizuru…….”

His heart was beating so fast he thought it would burst. The sound of blood rushing through his veins reached his eardrums.

Sweat beaded on his temples.

His throat was dry, and he couldn’t figure out how to breathe. 

‘It’s impossible. It’s impossible. Don’t get your hopes up.’

“Now, are you going to pay? Mister? If not, I’ll have to sell her to some other guy.”

Rodolgo grabbed Chizuru by the arms and pushed her staggeringly in front of Lukrov.

The closer she got, the more this illusion resembled Chizuru. It was not just the appearance, but every single gesture, every single detail, like the fact that the right hand was the first one she put forward when she was about to stumble; it was precisely the same.

‘Chizuru……’

‘I wonder how long this illusion will last.’

‘If I take my eyes off her even for a moment, will she disappear immediately?’

‘That might be the case. Maybe not.’

‘Please don’t disappear.’

Lukrov’s mouth had taken the liberty of telling Rodolgo, “Very well.”

He tossed all the gold and silver coins he had to Rodolgo without even counting them. Rodolgo and the old woman next to Chizuru’s illusion swarmed over them like animals as they scattered on the ground. However, Chizuru continued to stare at Lukrov alone.

‘Even if she’s an illusion, I can’t let her have such a worried look on her face.’

Lukrov’s heart was ready to be broken again.

The thought of him grieving after she disappeared again, as she always did, was enough to give him chills. Still, even if she was just an illusion, he wanted to protect her. It was an instinct that Lukrov could no longer resist.

“Are you coming or not?”

Chizuru nodded her head in response to Lukrov’s cold voice.

‘What about you, Chizuru?’

‘No! It’s an illusion. It’s her illusion.’

Lukrov continued forward, and as he approached the bewildered Chizuru, he extended his hand; surely she would disappear the moment he touched her. This was a dream, just a dream similar to the one he has had every time he woke up in sweat and tears in his cold, empty stone castle…….

However, Chizuru’s hand reached and squeezed Lukrov’s hand back.

The fresh touch sent numbness through his body. It was as if something hot was blowing out from deep in his gut. He picked up Chizuru with all his strength and placed her on the horse.

“Kya!”

A voice that sounded like a ringing bell tickled his ears.

Unable to resist, Lukrov pressed the illusion of Chizuru against his chest. He thought that since he could feel the touch of her hand in his, he might even be able to feel the euphoria of holding her in his chest…….

It became a reality.

“Lukrov……”

He felt as if his heart was going to burst. At the same time, he was filled with happiness and relief. As if his heart, which had been torn to pieces long ago, was being healed.

This wasn’t supposed to happen, but …… he didn’t want to miss this moment.

Lukrov immediately motioned for his horse.

He pulled on the reins, and his beloved horse immediately changed direction and began to gallop back the way it came. Lukrov held Chizuru as tight as he could. She was warm. Soft. She smelled sweet. Everything was the same as he remembered it.

This was a dream.

Lukrov spurred his horse on.

He couldn’t put any of his thoughts into words. All he could do was to keep drowning in this dream.

***

We’re almost near the end guys! can you imagine! will try to post the tomorrow or after Christmas.

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